RoR: Forum

Thank you for sharing this. Very moving.

Post 1

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 5:41am

What a beautiful tribute, Jennifer! If one cannot have an Objectivist parent when growing up, one would hope for someone with a joie de vivre and the self-respect to foster her child's volition and values. Your mother sounds like just such a person. What a great beginning to a long, fruitful life.

I remember my own mom being ebullient and open until she and my dad began to destruct when I was about 8 or 9. I'm thankful that she was so good until much of my own sense of life and willfulness were fairly well set. The grandmother that I was close to all my childhood was someone who had a great zest for living and was still driving a red Firebird until she was in her mid-70s. My teenage friends and I would stop by her house at midnight sometimes (at her behest) to play cards with her until 4 a.m. They loved her. She was a pistol.

Thank you for your story.

Post 2

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 6:25am

Lovely Jennifer! Thanks for sharing this. What a warmly written tribute. She sounds like someone I would like to meet.

John

Post 3

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 6:33am

Jennifer, I would love to take your mother out dancing! And I guess maybe you could come, too. ;-)

Thank you for this!

Jason

Post 4

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 6:42am

LOL Jason, I was going to say dancing too, but settled for just meeting her because I am sure she would dance my socks off!

Post 5

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 7:00am

John, I have no doubt I'd be sitting out quite a few of them with this firecracker, but luckily there's no shortage of gay men in Atlanta clubs who'd be more than willing to fill in for me! Most of us really do love kick-ass women.

Jason

Post 6

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 7:12am

Thanks to all of you for your warm reception of my tale. She really is quite a lady.

Jason, to give you fair warning, when we go out as a family we have to take shifts on the dance floor, because she *will not* sit down. Thankfully there are enough of us to make this work, but my brothers usually leave the dance floor gasping for breath.

I told my mother you specifically would post an invitation to take her dancing -- I expected it like I did the sunrise. :)

And she does a mean jitterbug -- she and my father could clear a dance floor. ;)

Post 7

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 7:20am

Well, Jennifer, A is A, the sun will rise, and I'm a diva-worshipping herdonist. So there we are.

:-)

Jason

Post 8

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 8:47am

Jennifer,

This is a lovely article, your mother does sound like quite a woman :-)

MH

Post 9

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 11:10am

Beautiful! I love your mother. One thing, though. She didn't build the foundation- you did. But I bet she had a lot to do with the furnishing!

Post 10

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 11:57am

Thank you Matthew and James.

James, it's interesting to see your perspective on this. I'd like to hear more about your theory.

You see, to me, she poured the concrete and hammered the beams sturdily into place, and then I added dry wall, shingles, etc.

By the way, she is able to do many of those things. It's frightening, really. She has one other nickname in the family -- "Bob Vila." Thanks to her, I can now lay tile, spackle like a mo'fo', and refinish furniture.

As Linz said to me when I posted this: "Christ! There are *two* of you???? Aaaaargh!"

Post 11

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 12:05pm

Jennifer: I agree with James. "Man is a being of self-made soul." -- Ayn Rand

Post 12

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 12:28pm

Jennifer,

I think I agree with your metaphor. Because children absorb experiences before they can completely conceptualize, the things that our parents feed into our subconcious lay the groundwork for our future selves. Of course, with great effort, we can rip this stuff out and rebuild, as I am doing. But good parents, and it sounds like your mom was a pretty good one, can give us such a headstart!

Kelly

Post 13

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 12:41pm

That is exactly what I meant, Kelly.

Shayne, of course man is such a being. I've not stated otherwise.

My point, however, is that I was given an excellent starter kit, and for that I am grateful.

Post 14

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 1:22pm

Jennifer: It's clear that you and Kelly don't really want to get philosophical or precise about your metaphor. Fine. It's probably beside the point anyway. But, don't then quibble with me about whether, from a more precise point of view, it implied something or not. I.e., make up your mind.

By the way, I also liked your article.

Post 15

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 1:43pm

...the things that our parents feed into our subconcious lay the groundwork for our future selves. Of course, with great effort, we can rip this stuff out and rebuild...

Kelly, That's an excellent analogy.

Jason

Post 16

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 2:08pm

Shayne, I'm glad you liked the piece.

Regarding the quibbling, it is not a matter of me having to make up my mind. My explanation is as simple as this:

My mother laid the foundation for my character. Had she built an unsturdy one, I would have had to rip it down and rebuild it. She did not, so I did not have to. I built upon what was already there.

So yes, I am a self-made soul, as I stand at this moment. But I was given excellent tools with which to craft this self.

Post 17

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 2:30pm

Dear Jennifer,

Thanks for the article. Each one of us sees in our parents -- or mentors -- special qualities that lift us and drive us. I read with special interest how your mother did this for you.

I regret that I won't be meeting you at SOLO C4. But maybe sometime soon.

Garin

Post 18

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 3:44pm

Jennifer: I understood you perfectly well. I just disagreed with you. I could elaborate, but I'm suspecting it's not a good idea. And it's off topic anyway.

Again, nice article. Your mother is quite a woman.

Post 19

Monday, April 18, 2005 - 3:56pm