Time to Get Real About Elections

Time to Get Real About Elections
by Walter Donway

Observing our selection of Presidential candidates this year, it becomes evident that ANYONE can run for President of the United States. Soon, this will be recognized by Americans at large, and shortly after, by politicians. The result, I predict, will be a radical reform of the election process. Because we don't bother anymore with the U.S. Constitution, this change is likely to come as a dictate or proclamation. To prepare readers for this blow, I have projected the appoximate nature of the proclamation we can expect. In the interest of realism, I have cast the proclamation in the language certain to be employed by the lawyers and bureaucrats who rule us. This makes for a rather difficult read, I understand, but persist. This is the shape of things to come, my friends.

A Proclamation

Whereas, it is the sense (a term applied
Advisedly) of Congress, reinforced
By panicked sundry pols on every side--
The several states concurring, and endorsed
By pollsters of impartial prejudice,
Unable to dissolve statistical
Deposits of their data to dismiss
The obvious--that citizens, who shall
Be known hereafter as “The Sovereign,”
Don't bother with elections (but Congress notes,
With gratitude, the useful citizen
Protecting transfer payments always votes
Until informed no payments can be cut);

And also, whereas, it is evident,
And here acknowledged, anyone, but
Anyone, can run for president,
Who yearns to program half-a-billion lives
With schemes that long experience reveals
To lawyers, senators, frustrated wives,
And others so well-known for high ideals;

It is proclaimed, this day, to hell with it
(The several states do solemnly agree
And polls reveal that no one gives a shit);
Henceforward, be it known, by lottery
Our nation monthly shall denominate
A citizen distinguished by good luck
(We badly need) to serve as head of state;
Campaign expense may not exceed a buck;
Said President, except for any praise
Of “hope,” shall not be subject to recall
For messing with our lives for thirty days;
And may the God of Mercy save us all.

Walter Donway is the author of a new book of poetry, Touched By Its Rays, which is presented on his Web site touchedbyitsrays.

Discuss this Article (9 messages)