OE USA: Andrew Bates is NOT Dead in a Ditch
by Julia Brent
As part of the OE USA: A New Zealander's Travels in the US, Part IV.5, I would like to submit that though Andrew was in a motor vehicle accident just a few hours ago, he is not, in fact, dead in a ditch. He was not injured, and the people he rammed - I mean the people also involved were not hurt. As of the most recent phone call, he was still waiting for the tow truck to take his front-end-crumpled van to the Ford dealer.
I'm too far away to get him, but he was in good spirits after I passed on from Lindsay that he needed to figure it out or Lindsay would "kick him in the ass." Linz would pick him up, but he's also too far away.
If anyone is close by, Andrew is at the Gainesville, Virginia exit off Route 66. His number has been previously posted. It's hard for him to place calls, because his mobile does not dial the number "1." If you can't pick him up, please send posts or emails of encouragement! Last I heard, he was going to either 1) sleep in the van with no blankets or 2) drive home with a leaking radiator, just pouring in lots of fluid. Don't call just to talk, because the phone battery is dying. I'm waiting up with the door open.
Who was at fault? If you have to ask that, you don't know Andrew Bates, with the long, straight kick.
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